An examining room. They made me strip down to my underwear and sit on this shinny metal table. I remember the table being very cold, so cold that I asked if I could move or get off it and a big booming voice shouts out “DO NOT MOVE AND DO NOT SPEAK UNLESS YOU ARE SPOKEN TO.”
So I sat there with goosebumps on my legs. I hear movement behind me and I hear “is this the kid” and a man comes over and starts examining me with his hands, with a stethoscope, and hits my knee with a rubber hammer. That’s all I remember. I was 5 years old.
I never really thought about it much, but as I began writing all this down, I casually asked my mother for the name of the airbase in Germany where I went to school in the afternoon.
She said, “you never went to any military airbase for school in Germany.” “Really,” I said. “Then where did I go to school in Germany?” I asked her. “Some school of the “Americus” at the university or something.” She said. “FOR KINDERGARTEN!!” I said. “Mom that doesn’t make any sense, I went to a military base for English school because Dad was in the Navy, right???” “
Don’t be ridicules, I’m your mother and I know where and when you went to school!” she says. “OK; Then what was the name of the school in Germany mom!” I ask. And she thinks and thinks and she can’t remember the name. We then proceed to have a huge argument about this. She finally walks away and says she doesn’t want to talk about it anymore.
I had always just assumed that I went to the German kindergarten in the morning and then the airbase in the afternoon, because of the connection through my father and that ís why I was there. If I never had asked my mother for the name of the airbase, I never would have thought twice about any of this. I never really thought about it much, but now that I do think about it. I clearly remember the German kindergarten, and clearly, I remember the airbase and the examining room. I don’t remember ever going to any other school or having any other friends from that school or even being there. I do remember the conversation with the man as to why they were taking me there, and I do remember the examining room.
It ís like a 5-second clip of a 10-minute movie. Just a couple of seconds and then it stops, and yet you somehow know there is much more.
When I asked my father if he knew where I went to school in Germany. He replied “sure” the McGraw Kaserne Army Troop Air Base. When I asked him about the examinations. He replied “we were told by a doctor that you had a “heart murmur or heart noise”, it was nothing serious but they wanted to examine me several times anyway.” The thing is later on after I graduated college I went in to see a cardiologist. I had been having chest pains for years from the massive steroid injections they had given me my freshmen year in college, I had developed arthritis in the cartilage between my ribs from my rib cage expanding so fast from the steroids.
When I asked about my “heart noise” the cardiologist showed me my print out and showed me that my heartbeat was absolutely perfect, and there is absolutely no sign of ANY “heart noise” what so ever!
Aug 1976– We move back to New Jersey, I began 1st grade, again, in the local school system. My mother held me back believing that I would do better in my schooling if I was one of the “older” kids in the class rather than one of the “youngest” (I guess my birthday was right on the border and it could have gone either way).
Sept 1979– My parents have been belligerent toward each other for some time now, and decide to get a divorce (at this point they separate). I am now 9 years old and am entering the 4th grade. As children, the school system tests all children’s IQ levels, I remember being told that I was an “absolute genius“. I don’t know what my IQ was but this was met with utter disbelief and I was mocked and ridiculed by the parents and teachers because I was the “Big dumb Jock“.
As I was by far the biggest kid in the class and the best athlete. However, I had a severe stuttering problem. I was considered to be the class idiot because I never spoke, and I never did well in school. {note: ironically, my own father was in the Navy, I was also held back a grade, and did not do well in school… except in arts, but in mathematics and similar subjects I failed miserably – branton} So the fact that I was this “genius” must have been wrong, and the parents of one of the most affluent areas in New Jersey would not accept that this big stuttering idiot could possibly be smarter than their sons and daughters so it was dismissed.
I had had the stuttering problem for as long as I can remember and all throughout my childhood I literally could not speak a complete sentence, many times I could not even speak a word. The thing is I cannot remember when or why I started stuttering, but I do remember being able to speak German fluently without any problem at all and having no speech problems German or English at all. I stuttered severely from about the time we got back from Germany up until the age of 25.
March 1981– My mother enrolls me in the “Silva Mind Control” course, and this is where I first remember meeting “the men in uniform.” The Silva Mind Control method is sort of a self-hypnosis course where you learn to dive down into the different levels of your mind.
You learn things like how to heal your body with your mind, relaxation techniques, ways to focus your concentration and melt spoons with your mind (things like that). You may have heard of it? Anyway, while in the course we learned to go to our “level” (a relaxed state of mind which is the bases of the Silva method). I was extremely good at all of the things we were doing for some reason right from the start. Children who are 11 years old are very cruel to each other.